Bearing the Cross
Full confession: Once or twice I have looked at other people's social media "lives" and it caused an ache of temptation to ask God why the crosses I see others carrying are all different weights and even why it seems there are some who carry no crosses at all.
This year has been the heaviest and saddest in the life of our family and, honestly, there's been a lot of questions from me to God. Why this particular cross? Why does it keep getting heavier? How can this cross possibly bring you glory?
And as I've been working through all the confusion in my heart I've been left with the knowledge that what I'm really battling is fear. So the question I've been asking myself is: What am I scared of?
Truth is, right now, I'm scared of God. Not in the reverent "fear of the Lord" way we are commanded to in His Word. But fearing Him. Being truly scared of His hand... fearing what else He will allow in my life
You see....in my grief I have allowed a lie to simmer. A lie that says God does not intend good for me. Untruth that tries to make me believe that terrible circumstances equal His desire for only unloving and painful providence in my life.
So now what? What do we do when God's sovereignty in our lives feels so painful? How do we keep from falling prey to the lies that will come?
1. Run, run, RUN to His Word! Read it, repeat it, sing it, write it, listen to it from others, meditate on it every moment, memorize it. Truth defeats the lies.
2. As often as you can.... think back through every instance in your life when the circumstance seemed so dark and heavy....remember how God was ever so faithful in those days. And recall to mind how His grace was sufficient.
3. And then know...GOD DOES NOT CHANGE. His truths are absolute and they speak words of life. Words that remind us of who HE is and who WE are because He purchased us with His blood.
Chapters and verses tell of a day coming soon when these crosses will become crowns that we will lay at His feet.
Preaching to myself but reminding you, friend: He loves you, He has not forsaken you, and He who promised is faithful to carry you to the end.
Britney M and her family serve with GlobalGrace in Kenya